I recently began reading the book The Yamas and Niyamas by Deborah Adele. If you haven’t heard of it, the book describes the ten guidelines for “exploring yoga’s ethical practice.” These guidelines are described in the book as jewels; they are “rare gems of wisdom that give direction to a well-lived and joyful life.” I am enjoying this book so much – it is very simply written, yet every chapter is filled with so much wisdom and truth that I want to keep reading it again.
The first guideline is Ahimsa, or non-violence. This isn’t non-violence of not hitting your brother when you are frustrated, or of not lashing out, but goes as deep as a non-violence of thought. As I have mentioned previously, I have a hard time with the inner mean girl in my head that is consistently putting myself down and even judging others. But this judgment is not serving anyone, especially not myself, and it exhausts me so much to consistently be trying to prove myself against the not good enough feelings in my head.
Through the principles in this book, I have begun to practice witnessing my judgment and then letting it go. This morning I had an especially interesting exercise in letting the mind go. My friend invited me to a 5 Rhythms dance class, because he knows that I have been trying to bring more fun into life and, even though I had no idea what 5 Rhythms was and have no dance training, I said yes. If like me you have never been to a 5 Rhythms class before, it is a two-hour free-dance class where there is no choreography and no judgment, the purpose of the class is to connect with the rhythm and be fearless.
As someone who is self conscious about my dancing ability and afraid of looking silly, I had a very hard time in the class. I spent the first hour looking around at everyone else dancing and judging myself for not having fun like they were, but being too afraid to let go. But then I remembered a quote from the Ahimsa chapter in the book, “Courage is not the absence of fear, but the ability to be afraid without being paralyzed.” I decided that I would dance even though I was scared of looking like a fool, and that I would dance so that I could make the experience fun. All of a sudden, I started smiling more and enjoying myself, and truly letting go.
By surrendering my fear of being judged and dancing anyway, I knew that I wasn’t looking foolish because I was dancing with conviction. And I didn’t care even if I did look foolish, because I was having fun. I was no longer judging myself or others, but was practicing being truly present and leaning into the fun.
Where can you practice non-violence in your life?
