Mentor Masterclass Holiday Challenge

For the past month, I have been participating in Jeannine Yoder's Mentor Masterclass Holiday Challenge. The purpose of the 24 day challenge is to support women in launching or building their life coach business. Each day, participants receive a video interview from Jeannine or one of the other mentors with a challenge to help build the confidence and skills needed to launch a business. Some of my favorite challenges have been taking time to celebrate our successes, to re-think holiday traditions, and to make a list of 30 reasons why you would make an amazing coach. Through these challenges and reflections, I have become more confident on the gifts that I have to share with the world, and more fearless about my ability to share them.

The end of the challenge is a Power of Themes Call, when Jeannine will be sharing the next steps for launching a great year. Even if you aren't launching a coaching business right now, this may be a helpful call for you, so I encourage you to sign up!

Happy New Year!

Happy New Year! Wishing you a happy and healthy 2018, filled with growth, wonder and joy.

Instead of making resolutions this year, I am attempting to define a theme for the year. 2018 will be the year of authenticity for me. I will be authentic in my way of being, I will be honest about my feelings and needs, and I will have the harder conversations, not just play pretend. This is scary for me - for so long I didn't feel like I was worthy of expressing my full self or that it wasn't safe to present my full being. But this is the year when all of that changes and I become the person that I am meant to be.

What is your word of the year?

7 favorite times of 2017

Happy new year! To celebrate the ending of a challenging year, I decided to put together the best moments that I am grateful for. 

1. Starting this blog and adventuring through California
2. Graduating from business school
3. Running the Boston Marathon
4. Moving to San Francisco to live with my husband again
5. Traveling to Paris with my mom
6. Getting and starting a job in California
7. Soul Camp

Take responsibility for your energy

One of my favorite podcasts is Oprah's Super Soul Sundays. This week, I listened to her interview with Dr. Jill Bolte Taylor, a neurologist who had a stroke. She stayed completely lucid while having a stroke, even though the left side of her brain had completely shut down. She had to re-learn her identity, how to walk and talk, and had to rebuild her life. One of the key pieces of insight that I appreciated was that she requested that her doctors take responsibility of her energy. Even though she was not able to communicate in the beginning, she could feel the energy and intention of everyone around her. And, since she was on such a healing journey, she did not have the energy needed to handle people who brought their own stress into her hospital room. She requested that everyone take responsibility of their energy. 

All of us have the ability to take responsibility for our energy in every situation. We unconsciously bring the stress from our work day into our home life, and the stress of our home life into our work day. If we instead make the effort to control our energy and be present, we can make a bigger impact and give others the space to heal. 

Homelessness in San Francisco

One of the hardest things about living in San Francisco is the volume of homeless people. Not because I am afraid or because they bother me, but because it bothers me how others can walk by and act like they don't see this huge problem. Twitter is worth at least $10 billion, but outside of the San Francisco headquarters is Union Square, where hundreds of homeless people sleep every night due to lack of resources. And I get so angry, because we should be doing more to help our fellow humans. Not just walk by them and hope that someone else will solve the problem, but I wish that there were more that I could do. Come 2018, I plan on volunteering and donating to play my part, but I wish that more would do the same. Because seeing this tragedy every day weighs on me, and I don't understand how it doesn't weigh on others.

Visiting dad

My dad passed away last October. He was sick for a long time and we didn't have the greatest relationship when he was alive, but his passing has been like losing a part of me. Every once in a while I think I'm used to it, but then I remember that I can't call him to chat for no reason and that I won't ever see him again, and it all comes falling apart again. Last year, the first Christmas without him, was the hardest, but every day is still a struggle. I've been told that it gets easier with time, but every time that I visit my dad at a gravesite instead of his apartment, it feels like the day he died all over again. But I know that feeling is better than acting like I'm okay, and I know that he wouldn't want me to be miserable just because he's not around. But grief is powerful, and sucks me under like a wave. The feelings don't go away. But maybe I'm getting stronger.

A reminder from Rumi

Some inspiration to start your day:

On forgiveness

I recently heard a story on the Untame Yourself Podcast that made me think more about forgiveness. She read the story of Officer Van de Broek, an officer on trial at the Truth and Reconciliation Commission after the apartheid. I copied this story from the Geoff's Shorts Website:

In a court stands Officer Van de Broek (aka Vanderbrook, Van Der Broek) who tortured and killed both the husband and the son of a nameless South African woman during apartheid. We are in a sitting of the Truth and Reconciliation Commission; the officer has just admitted his crimes, including shooting the widow’s son, burning his body and holding a party nearby.

The judge asks the grieving woman “How should justice be done to this man who has so brutally destroyed your family?”. She asks to be taken to the site where she witnessed her husband’s murder so she can gather the dust for a burial. She tells the officer that she wants for him to visit her twice a month so she could be a mother to him and share her love. Finally, she asks to hug him so he can know that God has forgiven him through Jesus. Those assembled break into a rendition of Amazing Grace so rousing that officer Van de Broek faints.

There are parts of my life that I recently discovered that I have been carrying resentment for. Life hasn't been perfect and I have been wronged, but by resenting someone else I realize that I am only hurting myself. If this woman can forgive the murderer of her family, perhaps I can forgive as well.

Christmas Presence

Merry Christmas! I hope that your holiday was filled with family time and love. This year I have finally realized that the holidays are not about presents, but about presence. Instead of counting down the time until I have to rush from one family event to the next, this year I am focusing on giving everyone my full attention and love.

How can you bring your full energy to your loved ones today?

Home for the Holidays!

Hello from Boston! I have been here since Thursday, and have already made a gingerbread house (see below!), cleaned out a closet and gone on errand trips. Tomorrow will be yet another holiday filled with family spread throughout the state, and I am so excited to see everyone for the first time in six months. 

Tim Ryan on America 2.0

Last week, my friend suggested a podcast interview with Congressman Tim Ryan on America 2.0. If you haven't heard about Congressman Ryan before, he is a Democratic Congressman from Ohio. He's the one who challenged Minority Leader Pelosi in November 2016. This podcast was regarding his new book, A Mindful Nation, on how meditating could change America. He began meditating in 2008, and now is proposing more mindfulness opportunities on Capitol Hill. I often see people hesitating on how to bring mindfulness to the "real world," and find this to be brave and bold.

Good Life Buckets

In the book How to Live a Good Life, Jonathan Fields describes his framework we have three buckets in life that we need to fill every day. They are the vitality bucket, the connection bucket and the contribution bucket. Vitality is the state of your mind and body (so you would fill this by exercising or eating well). The connection bucket is the state of your relationships (so you would fill this by spending time with loved ones). The contribution bucket is how you make a difference in the world (you would fill this by volunteering or giving back). The fuller our buckets, the better our lives. When one or more become empty, we become out of alignment.

I found this framework to be helpful because it makes considering my actions easier. If I am deciding whether or not to do something, I can ask myself whether it would fill up one of my buckets, and if not the answer becomes obvious.

Holding Space

I have recently discovered the beauty of someone holding space for me. Not trying to fix my problems, not bringing their own story into it, just being a person to talk to. It is so effective and helpful that I think we should all learn this important skill. The advice that I received on holding space was to focus on being grounded, expansive and impenetrable. It takes practice to not get onto the emotion roller coaster that someone else is on, but by being grounded you are able to give them a safe space to hold their feelings.

Kaveri Patel Poem

I found this Kaveri Patel poem (source) on sleep. I've recently been having more vivid dreams and actually remembering them for the first time in a while. 

Who Says I Can't Meditate in my Sleep - Kaveri Patel

I search for a buoy in this storm
as the black waves threaten to kill me.
The mind buoy has me swimming
in twenty directions,
my muscles cramping in fear.
The body buoy asks me to just float
and feel the true weight of my worries.

The breath buoy suggests I die
dissolving into the ocean itself-
the rise and fall of all experiences
and wise stillness underneath.

Fear of greatness

The host of one of the podcasts that I listen to was discussing the fear of failure, and mentioned the below cartoon. It's of a great white shark who is complaining, "The pressure to be great is too much. I'd rather be known as the Just Okay White Shark." We often subconsciously hold ourselves back because we're afraid of the pressure, and wonder what would happen if we didn't fail. How are you holding yourself back today?

Big Basin Redwoods State Park

Yesterday, we drove down to Boulder Creek, California, and went on a five mile hike in Big Basin Redwoods State Park. After a stressful few weeks, it was great to get out of our routines and into nature. The redwood trees were incredible, and we had a picnic overlooking the Pacific Ocean. There are even more hikes that I would like to explore, but this time we created our own loop from the Dool Trail to the Meteor Trail. I've decided that I need to hike more often, so hope to be back again soon.

Williams Sonoma Cooking Class

On Thursday night, instead of doing a typical holiday party or buying gifts, my department went to William's Sonoma for a cooking class. It was so much fun - we each prepared one of the dishes and then were able to enjoy the meal together. Our meal included a Cauliflower Soup, Kale Salad, Cous Cous, Chicken and a tart, with Olive Oil Cake for dessert. It was a great way to enjoy each other's company outside of work and learn some new dishes. 

Astrology

In my personal development journey, the next thing I would like to learn more about is astrology. I know that my sun sign is Cancer, and growing up I enjoyed reading my horoscope, but I know that there are several more levels of knowledge. I went to astro.com and made my free chart, but still don't quite understand what it means. 

My sun sign is Cancer, which means that I am reserved and very emotional. My moon sign is Virgo, which means that I am practical and hate chaos, which is also very true. But I know that there is a deeper layer there, and I wonder how to get there.

Do you know about astrology? Are there any disciplines that you wish you knew more about?

Why I work in Corporate Responsibility

I didn't want to write this post, because it is something that is so important to me that I have a hard time expressing it. But, maybe by expressing it here it will become easier to talk about.

April 15, 2013 (the Boston Marathon Bombing) was a day that changed my life. It started watching the triumph of human feats and ended watching the despair of people losing loved ones. The Boston Marathon is one of the greatest days of the year, thousands of people train for months for the opportunity to run 26 miles from Hopkington to Boston. Lots of people watch along the course and it's a great community event.

In 2013, it was a warm sunny day and I went to the finish line to watch the looks of triumph as people met their goals. We stood behind a barricade that had the flags of every country that the runners were from displayed on, and I remember feeling so inspired. After a few hours of standing I joked that I was tired from watching people exercise, and we walked away to get coffee. We had made it one block when we heard two blasts that sounded like cannons. My friend thought that the bleachers had collapsed, but then we passed a bar with a television and found out that it was even worse. Two bombs had exploded, one right in front of the flags where we had just stood. Hundreds of people were injured and three people lost their lives. It was a time of trauma, and everyone wanted to do something to help.

Very soon, the Mayor announced the creation of The One Fund, a foundation that would disperse funds to all of those effected by the bombing. Instead of having competing funds for each person injured, everyone would give to one place and then the fund would distribute the money fairly and transparently. John Hancock Financial was the first to give, and presented a check for $1 Million, and served as the financial backer for the fund. All other businesses and individuals followed the example, and soon the One Fund had the resources needed to help everyone recover.

I remember thinking that I wanted to do that. I wanted to be the company that steps up and makes a difference when it really matters. I wanted to be part of the community in a different way. So, two years later, I enrolled in business school and got my MBA, and now I help a company do this very important work every day.

Coaching

For a while now, I have toyed with the idea of becoming a coach and supporting others. I have made big progress in my life (especially recently), and feel like I am ready to help others on their path. But with this desire comes loads of self doubt and ego. I get caught up on what certification to take, or that I'm not currently the person that my friends turn to for advice. I wonder whether I want to be a coach just for the fact that it would make me special, or whether it is truly my calling. But it keeps coming back, and I do think that I could be of service. So I'm leaving this here on the internet to tell the universe that I'm ready. That's how all great journeys start if you ask me.